Man working behind tills at health food shop was able to identify baked goods (focaccia) through paper bag without looking at it

Woman came into cafe holding multiple bags of vacuums and moving around with a demented intensity. As I watched her leave she turned back and gave me a menacing yet seductive glare.

Most depressed train announcement I've ever heard. “Well…. This terminates at Hastings… Apparently“ followed by a long sigh.

Child did not once break eye contact with me across a cafe

Saw a dog dance on hind legs for much longer than I anticipated

Someone was using a hose and on first glance thought they were wrestling a giant rat

Mistook a broom for a dog. I think I'm undergoing some kind of animal related psychosis?

Got stopped by a girl half my age who asked about my outfit. She said she loves men dressed as ‘old fashioned gentlemen‘. I don’t know whether she was calling me old, or a suggesting I was a bit of a ‘character‘.

“Are you tripping balls Kiki?“ then “One fang sticking out” a woman on a train was saying to what I assume, and hope - is a strange looking child.

Saw woman wearing an outdoorsy style jacket, but the back was an entirely rhinestoned portrait of 3 tigers. Very classy.

Child smiling and throwing coins at a homeless woman like she was a busker

“I try not to get any falafel“ said a man leaving a shop called we love falafel, while holding falafel